Things Other Moms Have Taught Me

• Babies are new at this too - they won't know that you're screwing up


• A little dirt won't hurt them


• Make a list of one thing to do every day that once done, you won't have to do tomorrow. Windows, bathroom, etc.


• Baby can't thrive if Mom isn't thriving, take some time for yourself and don't feel guilty


• Formula isn't the devil


• Leave the baby overnight before they're one - it'll be easier for both of you if that big event is done sooner rather than later


• Sometimes all you can do is laugh


• Swimming is pretty much the miracle cure, it's fun and they take fantastic naps afterwards!


• All you really need is a pack of crackers, some wipes and a diaper.


• It's worth taking the time to put on makeup and real clothes, you'll feel better about yourself and your husband will appreciate the effort


• Bins in every room makes cleaning up way faster!


• In the first 6 weeks, don't worry about spoiling them, sleep habits or really anything. Just enjoy them.


• Don't freak out if they don't do things by the book, no baby ever follows every milestone perfectly


• You are not alone in whatever crazy thing your child has done - getting kicked out of daycare after 3 hours - you're not the first one to have that happen to...I hope...

Thanks to all the fantastic moms in my life! I appreciate you far more than you realize!

Happy Fathers Day!

Before Z was born, Mike had never held a baby. He had never changed a diaper or even witnessed a diaper change. He had never thought about baby names or how many kids he wanted. He always assumed he would want kids but never really thought about the details; it was just "sometime". Due to a happy oops, that sometime is now. He is a Daddy, and not just a Daddy, he is a wonderful, attentive, loving Daddy. He changes diapers, he blows raspberries, gives baths, he kisses Z goodnight and tells him daily that he is loved. Nothing melts my heart more than seeing Z cuddled up in his daddy's lap listening to a story. Z is loved and that fact will always be known to him. I was head over heels in love with Mike on the day we got married but nothing makes me more attracted to him and more in love with him than watching him play with his son. I knew he would be a great father but I had no idea how great. Thank you Mike. Thank you for being such a great husband and such a wonderful father. We both love you so much and I am so blessed to have you in my life! I love you!
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I just got back from the best weekend ever. And it was great timing. I needed a break so badly!
I had found a new dayhome for Z on the same day that I interviewed for a job that I really wanted. I took Z to the day home on Tuesday for the day and it went really well (no phone calls after 3 hours!) and Laura, the day home lady, said Z did just fine. He took a short nap in the morning so was a little grumpy but then took a 2 hour afternoon nap so she felt that he would settle in just fine. So I picked him up feeling very positive and happy about this dayhome. I was hoping to hear back from the job on Wed or Thurs but by the time I picked Z up from the day home on Thursday (his 2nd day) I hadn't heard anything and no news is rarely good news so I was a little anxious about that. And then I picked up Z....and my week went downhill from there. Laura handed me Z and I asked how the day went and she went "well...." and then went on to tell me that he basically cried all day and she wasn't sure it was going to work out and maybe we would be better in a daycare situation where there are more workers and he will never have to be left alone (apparently he screamed bloody murder everytime she had to leave him alone). She said she was willing to try again next week but she just wasn't sure and 'just in case' she gave me all his stuff back if I didn't want to bring him back. I really felt like she was passive-aggresively firing him. She didn't want to say she wouldn't, probably because she was with an agency and thought that would be frowned upon so she was encouraging me to do the leaving. So I took his stuff but didn't commit to whether or not I would bring him the next week, I just said I would call her either way. So that wasn't fun. Then Friday came and went without me hearing anything from the job which was basically me not getting it. They had said they would make a decision on Wednesday and I knew if I hadn't heard by Friday, it wasn't going to be good news. So at this point, it wasn't a good week.
But Saturday was the start of our vacation - our first ever baby-free weekend! Mom & Dad picked Z up early Sat morning and Mike & I headed to Calgary to see my brother & sister-in-law. We talked the whole drive there about life, day homes, jobs and money. It was great to just have that time to talk and be with each other. We decided that we would pull Z from the day home, obviously she didn't really want him and wasn't really to take the time to acclimate him to the new environment. We also decided that although my maternity leave had just ended, we would be okay for a couple months if I wasn't working. So we decided if I didn't get the job I had interviewed for, I would wait until September to look for full time work. Then Z would be a little older and perhaps will adjust to daycare better. We also discussed Mike potentially changing careers, unfortunately youth ministry hasn't been working out right now and the bank just really isn't what he wants to do long term. He is thinking of going into the trades, it's working with his hands which he would enjoy more and to be honest, it pays a lot better. So we are going to investigate some options in that field, possibly electrician, carpenter or plumber.
So our drive was great, very relaxing and we made a lot of plans for our future. We got to Calgary and had a great time with Brian & Suzanne. On Sunday morning we went to the zoo with them and with Joella and Chris, who I've only seen once in the last year. So that was wonderful and a lot of fun. Sunday afternoon we drive to Canmore and just had a wonderful relaxing time. We went to Banff and went for a hike around Lake Louise and went for a mountain drive (we even saw a bear!). And then I heard from the job - I didn't get it but they said they had a maternity leave position opening up in August that they were wondering if i would be willing to be considered for. Which would be perfect. The timing is great and there is no pressure with a one year position. I had to wonder if i was having a hard time finding a job because I am seen as basically another maternity leave waiting to happen. So this would be great! I will know end of July is I have the job so that gives me 2 months to find a dayhome for Z! So that took a lot of stress off my life.
Such a great vacation. And Z did great with my parents - 3 nights away from me and he barely cried. I missed him SO much but it was so nice to get away and now I feel relaxed and rejuvenated!

Some Pics from our vacation

We spent 3 days in beautiful Canmore this weekend! So wonderful & relaxing! more details later...

I miss my sister

Sometimes I just want to call Mel and invite myself over for coffee...but then I remember that she lives 8 hours away. I've always wished that my sister lived closer but never more so now that we both have children the same age and are both stay at home moms. It's hard, I feel alone and lonely a lot of the time. My friends are fantastic, they are always so willing to come to me because they know I can't go out as often but they aren't there during the long boring days and although they love me & Z, they don't want to talk about teething and diapers and all the laundry I have to do. And the ladies in my Bible Study are great, they are fantastic to talk to about being a mom but I'm just not close to them - I can't talk to them about life. I want mommy friends, like close friends who have kids. Right now I have a bit of both and I feel like I can't relate to either of them. The people I know with kids are close to 10 yrs older than me and none of my close friends are in the same stage of life as me. It's hard. I'm lonely. And my days are boring. Z hates the stroller so it's hard to go for walks with him or go shopping. And we have no money so I really can't do anything that would cost money. So I stay at home and watch TV all day...not the most exciting life. I want my sister. She would understand. She would talk babies with me but also talk about life. She would hang out with me and just be my friend. I miss her.

Really Zach...Really?

So Z got kicked out of his dayhome...after 3 hours. I was so excited about this dayhome. We went to a ton of them, and they were just awful. Most of them could barely speak English and really seemed liked they had no actual interest in the kids. One home had this poor little girl camped out in front of a Punjabi soap opera...not where I want Z to be. Another was so messy that I felt like I would have to give Z extra immunizations to just let him stay there. One had like 10 kids in this tiny little condo. But this one was so good. It was an older Christian lady who had this beautiful, well designed, home within walking distance. She had a great basement area for the kids, separate sleep areas, a nice big fenced in yard..it just seemed perfect. Z seemed to like her, he immediately hugged and kissed her when she saw him. I was so excited, we had decided to put Z in the day home 2 days a week until I went back to work so he would get used to it without it being full time, so I dropped him off yesterday and had all these plans to clean my house and just feel relaxed for a day. I had a nice breakfast, a second cup of coffee and then had all the laundry piled in the living room floor ready to be sorted and folded and all that fun stuff....and then the phone rang. It was Kathleen, at first I thought I must have forgotten something but instead it was her saying that she needed me to come pick Z up...he was too much for her to handle. Apparently he only took a half hour nap (in reality, I was actually just impressed that he slept at all his first day in a new place) so he was tired and grumpy and apparently into everything. He was pulling himself up and crawling all over the place and she was worried he was going to get hurt and she couldn't just follow him around and still keep an eye on the others. I know she just over extended herself and its better that we found out immediately that it wasn't going to work but I'm still so frustrated. 3 hours!! That is definately not enough time to make a decision. What kid is going to be fantastic his first day away from Mom? He's not going to sleep well, thats a given. And he's going to explore a new place so of course he's getting into everything. I do think he would have settled in and be fine if she gave him a chance, but she didn't. Not that I'm bitter about that or anything...not at all.... So now I have to find a new day home for Z, pray I get a job soon but not before I find a day home and pray he doesn't get kicked out of the next one. I definately barely slept last night because I was so stressed. I just cried when Kathleen called me and then called Mike and he came home from work and we just played with Z and tried to remember that we are not in control and all we can do is pray and just trust God that He will provide us with wisdom and direction but not gonna lie, right now, it's hard to trust.

This is a typical day in our house...

Look Mom, I can get my own toys!

And I can drag my stuff all over my room!